3 Steps
by slightlystarry
Summary: ...Jacob stared at the rolling ocean beneath him, the wild frothing waves that crashed in to the craggy rocks of the cliffs with groaning force, waves that swirled and crisscrossed in to the distance..." One Shot Where Jacob went after Eclipse


**Author's Note: This is what I imagined Jacob doing after the end of **_**Eclipse**_**. It was written really quickly, so please overlook run-ons or other grammar mistakes. And I know it doesn't sound much like Jacob, but it's interesting to picture him likes this, isn't it?**

_3 steps…2 steps…1 step. _Jacob stared at the rolling ocean beneath him, the wild frothing waves that crashed in to the craggy rocks of the cliffs with groaning force, waves that swirled and crisscrossed in to the distance until they disappeared in to an expanse of twisted black clouds scarred with lightning. He was perched at the edge of the cliff, his toes curled over the edge. Wind buffeted his lanky yet muscular body in a whirling rage, smothering everything with its vicious howling.

He should go home. But he couldn't. Staring in to the churning ocean, all that he could think of was Bella. This was the cliff. She had stood here at this very spot, staring down at the ocean as he did now. She had come here for a respite, he knew it. A rescue from the pain that tortured her eyes even when she was laughing. And now, he had come for a respite as well, except this time to avoid her. He had hoped so desperately that somehow, the rage of the storm could drown out his sobs and moans, that the rain could pelt his face until it melded with his tears and they became one.

But _she_ was unavoidable. Every moment he blinked, he could feel her presence illuminated behind his eyelids, her pale skin and the dark hair that curled its way softly down her back. And how small she seemed in his arms, how delicate and…

_Shut up, shut up_. He clenched his eyes shut. This was the way it had been for weeks, ever since the invitation had come, complete with the note enclosed in flowing script from Edward. _Thank you-for her-for everything_. And he had known it then that he could never heal, that the part of himself that looked after her wistfully as she turned to climb in to her pickup truck would never re-patch itself, that it was more broken than his groaning, creaking body. And as long as that was the case, he couldn't ever face her again.

_But she loves me. She knows it._ But she loved Edward more, and that was final. She was marrying Edward. There was nothing in her for him. No one to dream about or hope to see or to love. And so there was nothing left for him to do but end it. A clean break.

A bone-shattering crash of thunder sounded through the air, its force seeming to make the trees bend over backwards. Jacob's eyes snapped open, and he stared once more down at the ocean. Would he…could he…?

He imagined himself falling in to the ocean, his body mangled by the jagged rocks. Not even his healing abilities could save him from that. Maybe it would be better after that, wherever he ended up. Death wasn't a black void, it was an end to the long, tormented nights. Again, he looked in to the waves. They seemed so welcoming now, as if his body would be folded gently in to a wave and disappear as the wave crashed against the shore, as if his pain and torture would dissolve in to the frothing of the water. _That_ would be heaven.

He didn't hold back. With a push of his powerful legs, Jacob was in the air, his body stretched out as it was illuminated by the electric reflection of a lightning bolt, his long, black hair flying. Only then, when his body was suspended in the air, did he think of Billy, of Embry and Quill and Sam, and of what they would do without him. But it was too late.

With a sweep of his arms, he was spiraling through for the ocean and the dark rocks that loomed underneath the water's surface, waiting to take him just as Bella had taken his heart. He was not afraid, and he regretted nothing. This was the way things had to be. As he broke the surface of the water, he smiled.


End file.
